Thursday, October 29, 2009

Sky is Falling

Variations of this same scenario have played out in my head a thousand times since Jim was hospitalized a few years back. We have heard whispers of lay-offs many times before, but not like this. Jim thinks it will be just before Christmas, maybe sooner.
Meanwhile, we have to get the closets, flooring and trim completed to bring closure and meaning to all of our hard work so far and for the “what ifs” around the corner. And somewhere in all of this chaos, we have to keep pushing around school, state, and managed care to keep our oldest on track – find some answers. We have to protect and maintain normalcy for all three of our children and keep up with the “routines.” The clouds above are letting loose and as I hold up my umbrella, I wonder how long it can stand up against this relentless downpour. Fearful of the unknown future, I comfort myself with this thought:
In every one of my scenarios and possible outcomes, I still have this family. That is a ground zero we can certainly build up from despite any devastating collapse. That is the only truly important “thing.”

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