tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84593637852998754962024-03-05T22:41:00.871-05:00A Perfect FifthIn music, “A Perfect fifth” is the most consonant harmony, and is the basis for most western tuning systems. In our home, the five of us create a perfect harmony...our kind of "perfect." This blog is an intimate portrait of our busy family life; It is about relationships that are real and unscripted. It is about motherhood & beyond.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.comBlogger48125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-48276711845037933182014-05-15T14:48:00.001-04:002014-05-15T14:49:34.446-04:00A New Spring And All That Blooms<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiaRYecbfycEsQ6I4HXoADlNSbRgKTG8E-hDwBEo_IgErPoSs7MTzOhlqI3tvZKwsEEinqJM77NNpN_j9BHhkiabKXDgIKx0P6QCtGA1tcwYw9tSbqUGvAjIoxedcTfAGvutL3apT2lLU/s1600/DSCN7361.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiaRYecbfycEsQ6I4HXoADlNSbRgKTG8E-hDwBEo_IgErPoSs7MTzOhlqI3tvZKwsEEinqJM77NNpN_j9BHhkiabKXDgIKx0P6QCtGA1tcwYw9tSbqUGvAjIoxedcTfAGvutL3apT2lLU/s1600/DSCN7361.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
So far as we know, each day is a blessing all of it's own. Not a single one promised, but all to be cherished. Years have passed and a new Spring is here with the promise of all things that bloom in her embrace, ready to shake out into the gardens and fields all around us. I can see so clearly where we have been, where we are now, and the possibilities the future might hold, and it is exciting!JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-23231455003220605472010-04-07T14:31:00.001-04:002010-04-07T14:34:06.858-04:00Said and Unsaid<span style="font-style:italic;">Asparagus</span>. That is the lighthearted nickname we have created for our son’s ‘special’ medical diagnosis – Asperger’s Disorder. I can say that now. I am ready to talk. You see, I have not written anything in quite some time. I have not been posting any new recipes, have not excitedly announced Loren’s new initiatives to begin her acting career here on this blog, not updated on all the daily family and home goings-on, not ranted over anxious family gatherings that have taken place, not un-earthed feelings of depth on any level, just keeping afloat. Where the first twenty were about survival and the last ten were about finding myself and identifying with new and unfamiliar roles and walking through birth and loss, this year, my thirtieth year, has been about recognition, coming to terms, and healing. We not only saved Sadie and Lucy’s lives in the last few months, but we are reclaiming our own.<br /> <br />For the past year, since last April, we have not only been in the thick of a job crisis and in the sixth consecutive year of remodeling our home, but have been on a journey to figure out why our home life is so chaotic despite all of our tremendous efforts to protect and nurture it. Just because something has become “normal” to us, does not mean it is or that it works. That said, we have been quietly seen for regular group therapy two to three times each month, and have had Nate thoroughly evaluated by three individual specialists, and have done much work inside the parenting trenches during these confusing and intimate twelve months.<br /> <br />While our facebooks detail the basic synopsis of each day so that we do not loose touch altogether, we are spending far more time getting to know one another again with new information. We are patting ourselves on the back for recognizing needs and facing them bravely no matter who believed in us or supports us now. We have been taking more care to appreciate all the little things we loved before, only with more respect and love than we could with the knowledge we had then. It has become an exercise of will, to constantly infuse our lives with respect for each person’s individual needs in the battleground of conflicting personalities that is our home, but it is something we’ve always strived for and will continue to.<br /><br />So our oldest is an “Aspie.” Nate has always been unique, so have all three of our children, as much as any child is, but he being different further still. Nate’s “label” became official in March but was suspected in final impressions by his first specialist last August. After a trial round of meds, a trip to the hospital during one infamous tantrum of the many, and more internal restructuring of our everyday life, we can now say we are okay with the outcome of Nate’s journey so far. Nathan is so many things to us: caring, sweet, thoughtful, creative, smart, funny, interesting, quirky, picky eater, and admittedly not a very good hugger, but this label only means that he sees life differently and evolves in social atmospheres differently. He has difficulty reading people and they him. But what he does see is incredible. He notices things that others would never give a thought. He sees every physical or linear object with the lens of a microscope. He absorbs large volumes of information and can recite it back. Nate sees the world in a structured way and things have to have purpose and construct. Actions are right or wrong. He is both complicated to a fault and yet refreshingly simple.<br /><br />Meanwhile our daughter is struggling with an Attention Deficit that is undeniably frustrating to both her and us while putting her half a reading level behind at school. Yup, the school we have come to have a very strained relationship with thanks to issues with Nate; The one school available to her for grades pre-K to 4th grade. Lucky for her, Loren’s Daddy and Uncle have passed on this hereditary link and so she too has the amazing gift of being ten steps ahead of everyone else, super smart and yet so underestimated. She is impulsive and charming, popular and fun, entertaining and sweet, but she is always in a struggle to meet her full potential when it hinges on holding her attention on something longer than 10-15 minute intervals. She can easily pioneer through “grey area” situations and binges on any food that is knowingly “bad” for her or high in sugar. We joke that she has never walked a day in her life. It’s true. She jumps, skips, hops, pirouettes, runs, bounces, but never walks. She is so very talented in so many ways but such a polar opposite to her older sibling, it is remarkable. Loren, who has always wanted to be in show business and the art world, has begun to get the medical help she needs to reach her long term goals, alongside her older brother this year. She has begun her own website which is still under construction, has added acting classes to her busy afterschool activity list and has already starting taking auditions in hopes of landing an agent before long. She continues her very own journey with us at her side and has decided it is now time to make her room “more her.”<br /><br />Gabe is our resident bully. Without him, I’d be lost and with him, I want to rip my hair out, lol…He is painfully “normal” with all the nuances normality brings. He has the regular brand of 3-5 year old tantrums and often says things off-the-cuff that make you roll onto the floor laughing when you really shouldn’t. He is a an overtly physical child that loves rough-and-tumble play, loves to hum while he eats, loves to eat! Gabe also gives the best hugs and his chubby little hands wrap around you the warmest of all. As long as he thinks it is his idea, he is game for pretty much any schedule, meal or adventure, but he is more than okay with getting the run-down beforehand too as he likes to plan when it is available to him. He is naturally good at almost anything he tries and everyone instantly is drawn to and likes him, though he is stubborn and won’t back down on anything. In sum, he is his father (with higher concentration level), reincarnated. Thank God for this miracle to complete our family.<br /><br />And so we are, just a family, an every day complicated, busy family. "Special Needs" are just needs. We are still moving forward, one step at a time, and the future looks good. For sake of time and my own sanity, I won’t bother filling in all the blanks on my recent foodie finds, current tv, film and book reviews, commentary on the latest news or even all the spring work on the house, I will just keep the focus on this page, where it is in my heart – <span style="font-style:italic;">on them</span>. …Now here we are, all caught up.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-29015918887926450332010-02-17T08:33:00.004-05:002010-02-17T08:44:31.463-05:00Foster Pups<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4ozoGwwb7zV1K6tH8a3wX9P_niGH9S40v-6EB104UvouVSxPLrkWN_oq0L96L26zaxXkY1dpf3f9MuskiMvAHLv5FEjUloFFN45qKe2LmmQO4QMAn4WMO6ATZCyoA66K68Bo7wekR2Kc/s1600-h/DSC00611.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4ozoGwwb7zV1K6tH8a3wX9P_niGH9S40v-6EB104UvouVSxPLrkWN_oq0L96L26zaxXkY1dpf3f9MuskiMvAHLv5FEjUloFFN45qKe2LmmQO4QMAn4WMO6ATZCyoA66K68Bo7wekR2Kc/s320/DSC00611.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5439206512630327938" /></a><br />Meet Sadie & Lucy, sisters scheduled for lethal injection at 10am on January 27th in the city kill shelter. Their crime: Being abandoned and homeless. Their punishment: death. Since we could not let that happen to these precious little girls, we rescued them just in time to bring them home where they have been our “foster pups” for the last three weeks. So glad we did!<br /><br />Lucy is the older, wiser “sage-like” sister. She had been a mother too at one time. She is camera-shy and quiet. She is a smooth and silky chocolate brown with deep warm, loving eyes. Lucy does not take any silliness from her younger sibling and while allowing her playtime and appeasing her in this way, she also takes adoption very seriously and does not allow her little sis to get naughty, growl, or play too rough. She immediately polices her into submission and reminds her of her status as “alpha.” She prefers the company of the other “alpha” in the house ;-)<br /><br />Sadie is a longer-legged, lanky and younger blonde beauty with a constant alertness, cool attitude and playful, child-like nature. While she has less patience for the children holding her, she is the first to seek out their attention and praise and prefers their company to that of the adults. Sadie is also a great “fetcher” and has already executed several new toys, extracting the inner “squeeker” with expert precision. She is always very proud of herself and struts around in front of the camera like any other “show-off.”<br /><br />Both girls are very loyal, sweet, and loving. Both have now been spayed and are recovering well. Both have been mostly potty-trained and are now on a grain-free, probiotic-infused diet. They are great and while we have not decided to keep them forever yet, are so happy that these two girls did not meet a premature end on a cold cement slab, scared and alone. We are committed to making sure they live a long and pampered life from here on out.<br /><br />And remember...you can make the difference in a pet's life today! Adopt or Foster a pound puppy near you! To learn more, please visit http://www.spcai.org or search local shelters and rescue operations at http://www.petfinder.comJThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-86009346395207365422010-02-08T00:51:00.002-05:002010-02-08T00:55:27.304-05:00Evolution<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd4boOJzVVU-iY7JUYxEGryPLtYmnnbrKZho2CZcL-DnS5murnBHJ4aJYfTefZIO8EaG8tD9H8OXBRg0CWtcQgy9SOE_N6sJaVzvZnCSrmAjFxcl3FGtvPxbkuUwUCKSYRU0GU2KJjPfg/s1600-h/DSC00569.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd4boOJzVVU-iY7JUYxEGryPLtYmnnbrKZho2CZcL-DnS5murnBHJ4aJYfTefZIO8EaG8tD9H8OXBRg0CWtcQgy9SOE_N6sJaVzvZnCSrmAjFxcl3FGtvPxbkuUwUCKSYRU0GU2KJjPfg/s320/DSC00569.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5435747185190018626" /></a><br />So much has happened since I updated last. I have been so very busy. The book is underway, at least it is my sincere hope that it becomes one some day. I am hopeful for many things, all of which (despite the horrors and pain around us) I see now as possible. You see, if I am to believe (as I would have my children do so), that all things dreamt, may be achieved, than I too, have to uphold this faith. That is clear to me now. I am still taking better care to take time for me. I have reconnected with “the girls” and stayed true to my goals of better balance; mind and body. I’m cooking everything – I’m involved in many creative projects, I’m taking things slower and holding out for that “right job” while appreciating every day with my babies that I possibly can …before I cannot. Wouldn’t it be great to live in Denmark for awhile? Lol …Wouldn’t it be great if “homemaker” was actually a paid occupation? Wouldn’t it be great if a woman obtaining a college degree to then stay home and raise her own children was thought to be a profitable investment, wise choice, healthy balance? I think so. But this is not our world here. And so, off to work I shall go, …but not without a fight. In keeping with my plan for wellbeing overall, I am being extremely “picky.” I want to be happy and accessible to my children and husband. I will wait it out. And in this period of waiting and healing…we hear back any day on Nathan’s final diagnosis. Two months off medication now, he is the same child. He is so very special and loved. Some things will never change …but some will.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-69279755630687783282010-01-06T15:51:00.001-05:002010-01-06T15:53:18.139-05:00The New Year Plan<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs9kKxJ-J9HBuBiiWrMoKSJU-Hwmgj-8roe1_VXvJFMmQZ35vT6pMaMxdqWuMXNWlKdTLbrZO0yuCAz9MwhMG4RT_YPmA_Whe9g4SWw0RNHU0R6yddHLOYY26p0Jvvi_tykALjQjztEw0/s1600-h/DSC09924.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs9kKxJ-J9HBuBiiWrMoKSJU-Hwmgj-8roe1_VXvJFMmQZ35vT6pMaMxdqWuMXNWlKdTLbrZO0yuCAz9MwhMG4RT_YPmA_Whe9g4SWw0RNHU0R6yddHLOYY26p0Jvvi_tykALjQjztEw0/s320/DSC09924.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5423732751451872146" /></a><br />I have decided to write a book. Not the usual, begin a chapter, than crumple it up and throw it out. This time, I am really going to give myself the courage to stick with the story and follow it to the end. It will be a fiction of course. How else could any of the drama, exaggeration, outlandish and hyperbolized richness of my tales be done justice and allowed enough space for the characters to breathe? And seeing as how my own mother claims that “I can never remember things the way they actually happened,” maybe my own creative wanderings will bring more excitement to the reader than a boring real life memoir anyway. One thing is for sure, I have plenty of stories to tell! It is all part of my grand 2010 plan. During the past many (insanely busy) weeks, I have been developing a “plan” for going into this new year. Under the duress of routine family life that is anything but routine, I have (gulp) decided to take more time for me…yup, me. The plan is simple: start taking better care of the person that nurtures and cares for everyone else. I am going to get into shape so I can feel more energetic, sleep better, and crave the wholesome foods I feed the kids. I am going to delegate better and say “no” even more so that I have more time to do the things I love: athletics, reading (for leisure), photography, painting and writing. I am even open to the idea of leaving my comfort zone and self-proclaimed “hermitizm” to join some girlfriends for drinks and fun from time to time. It could be a good time…I think. The point is, with all that has taken place this past year, I have begun to feel physically run down, rushed and forgotten from time to time. That has to end here and only I can make that happen. Cheers to the parents brave enough to boldly face your fears and gripes alongside me this 2010 and choose better health, artistic freedom, and happiness for this year’s resolutions..JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-3691770066546154212009-12-13T09:29:00.002-05:002009-12-13T09:50:48.896-05:00Chef Rocco and Other TopicsSo last night, ok well...only a few hours ago, I came home to bed down with my husband after a friend's annual Christmas party. Like every year, it is the one time that we can actually spend time out together, without the children - as "grown-ups!" Also, it is probably one of the few times during the year, that I actually have a few drinks and "let loose." As a mom who (appears) to "have it all together" most of the time, this is SO much fun! Nothing was off limits in the evening's topics and the wine tasting did not end until long after midnight. Chef Rocco's latest pick (Avacado Relish) in the Costco holiday recipe book, was up for chatting and review. The verdict was - spectacular! ...Just add a few teaspoons of minced garlic. Men's underware choices and <span style="font-style:italic;">what women really want</span> to see on their man, was another topic covered in our circle of silliness. After several full glasses of wine, this particular subject empassioned me to speak up and "advise" the "tighty-whity" wearing friend (can't believe he admitted it), that this practice should cease immediately and the drawers of his undergarments cleansed! lol ...Last year's party and the "ass-grabbing" aunt came up, bringing barrells of laughs that just wouldn't stop... And amongst all the merriment and good people, we agreed that next year (with the addition of "boy M & Ms and "Jello Shots"), will be even more fun! ...Oh the way I'm paying for it now though!JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-84371170514079093742009-11-27T14:14:00.003-05:002009-11-27T21:06:30.330-05:00Till' You Drop<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFfxG_QcDIT_SYLnoU5bSVsapKZ6EAWQSLGOKlyeIrag-MRNxZXVUXM7EXdXvYK7uQSX2QmjRbDqEVNzVRyiccVwotwQLZjkLB2N0cf1O9YHbqIgf73FRDfbsCGJdN0lJIBheRDXStaaM/s1600/shopping-cart.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFfxG_QcDIT_SYLnoU5bSVsapKZ6EAWQSLGOKlyeIrag-MRNxZXVUXM7EXdXvYK7uQSX2QmjRbDqEVNzVRyiccVwotwQLZjkLB2N0cf1O9YHbqIgf73FRDfbsCGJdN0lJIBheRDXStaaM/s320/shopping-cart.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5408874989110562386" /></a><br />Have you ever wondered why they call Black Friday, <span style="font-style:italic;">Black Friday</span>? I was wondering this very thing as I stood in line waiting for my turn at the checkout early this morning (before any sane human being would think of rolling out of bed). Clearly I do not place myself in the catagory of sane because I too was there. If you find yourself in this situation and you are lucky enough to a) secure parking location, b) find a cart and c) grab everything on your list before it has been hoarded by the mob (while not getting trampled), than you have to know that karma is automatically going to place you in the longest line possible or one where the person just in front of you has selected many items for which there is no price tag and delays ensue. In my case, the line was so long that it began on the other side of the enourmous store and was being maintained by a giant roll of "caution" tape. <span style="font-style:italic;">Caution</span> is something all Black Friday goers seem to need a lesson in. For one thing, we are all up and driving around in the darkness before we've even gotten the turkey & wine out of our system...before we are even really awake. As if that is not scary enough, we pair this state of grogginess and poor judgement with a general irritation I like to call the "Holiday Ho-Hums" and my kid's call "The Bah-Hum-Bugs." Before the sun came up today, I witnessed many an' <span style="font-style:italic;">Ebaneezer Scrooges</span> in my midst. It is so unfair that our children ask Santa for so many things that we cannot even pronounce and have never seen, nevermind pay for! They peacefully sleep in bed, dreaming up happy little elves peicing everything together in The North Pole's magical workshop. Meanwhile, mom is down at Target wrangling the competition to the ground over the last shelved treasure bearing the 50% off doorbuster tag. This is not a sport for the rational, or weak of heart - it is a fierce and brave sisterhood. Fare well my wild-eyed, crazy-haired, minivan-driving, profanity-screaming, sale-loving mamma's. I am headed home for a well deserved nap-er-roo!JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-66333374501583023642009-11-23T09:51:00.003-05:002009-11-23T09:55:46.734-05:00Down Time<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-Yl8ZoY0c-IvumTGPzv6Mynw1VxFnxEva0deCr76iWKH7Rtvw6fVdgO5DA3wnO7VA3gZGC65Ria92O2oIJ7NcXpjOSnBz7kjskIqHH0bJMEVg9uiT_tLOPwWyyhyphenhyphengzyMH7oMCYj25IaE/s1600/DSC00087.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-Yl8ZoY0c-IvumTGPzv6Mynw1VxFnxEva0deCr76iWKH7Rtvw6fVdgO5DA3wnO7VA3gZGC65Ria92O2oIJ7NcXpjOSnBz7kjskIqHH0bJMEVg9uiT_tLOPwWyyhyphenhyphengzyMH7oMCYj25IaE/s320/DSC00087.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5407312502275919394" /></a><br />Most days I love my life. Today though, I am weakened from this week-long flu that won’t go away, a schedule of “to do” that won’t let up, and kids that seem to never lack energy. <span style="font-style:italic;">They</span> are finally off to school. <span style="font-style:italic;">I </span>am sitting in my room, doubled over and rocking from side to side to see if I can get more sleep upright than laying down. I know this is possible because I have (on more than one occasion) witnessed my husband sleeping peacefully while sitting upright in a chair. The clock is reading 9:27am – this leaves me with approximately 2 hours to attempt some rest and recovery. Glancing now across the room at the heap of laundry laying on my bed, I close my eyes. Breathing in…out…in…out…eyes open again. The phone is ringing and the washing machine alarm just went off. That was a nice little break. Maybe I’ll try again tomorrow.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-33501544205531255372009-11-12T08:43:00.002-05:002009-11-12T08:58:16.726-05:0050 Things<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVCz4-CkTFsIG6R3UuBXnOa_MCzFNivK5yohM6rTVJS6iQlG-inv1glY2J0xe_3II4pMn8W-FNbKOIhrwbyeWqd3WcLrt4WasrkGaro5I9T9oZA7zJDoF4Fd0fvnNq0ScfAqRVQ_Idjhk/s1600-h/DSC00060.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVCz4-CkTFsIG6R3UuBXnOa_MCzFNivK5yohM6rTVJS6iQlG-inv1glY2J0xe_3II4pMn8W-FNbKOIhrwbyeWqd3WcLrt4WasrkGaro5I9T9oZA7zJDoF4Fd0fvnNq0ScfAqRVQ_Idjhk/s400/DSC00060.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5403216136866482786" /></a><br />20 Things that have become normal:<br /><br />1. Not sleeping – <span style="font-style:italic;">ever</span><br />2. Not eating – <span style="font-style:italic;">very much</span> and not usually while sitting for long<br />3. Feeling like there are never enough hours in the day and never completing my (very unrealistic) “to do” list<br />4. Being tired of the sound of my own voice<br />5. Wearing PJs all day<br />6. Being surrounded by spontaneous tantrums and outrageous drama<br />7. Being late and anxious for any social function or errand I must attend<br />8. Never dropping my guard and advocating for these children every moment of every day, in any situation; never fully “relaxing”<br />9. Laughing and crying interchangeably and with no commitment to either one<br />10. Expecting the unexpected at all times<br />11. Not being grossed out by anything<br />12. Letting chaos reign and being okay for lack of control over things I cannot change or help<br />13. Seeing old things and things I hadn’t noticed in new and exciting ways<br />14. Have more to loose, but being stronger and braver than ever before<br />15. Placing more value on my time, feeling like I can always find a better way to be efficient and yet spending more time “in the moment”<br />16. Cooking (said I never would) and concentrating on healthy meal planning<br />17. Having (a lot of) extra people in my bed at night<br />18. Thinking that cuddling on the couch and watching a family movie together is the best “wild night out” I could ever want and the most fun ever.<br />19. (acknowledgement of) the awesomeness of God and appreciation of the spiritual journey<br />20. Feeling like no reward in life can compete with a healthy & happy family<br /><br /><br />20 Things that have become strangely unfamiliar:<br /><br />1. Religion<br />2. Bathroom privacy or <span style="font-style:italic;">privacy of any kind</span><br />3. Sleep<br />4. Having a voice or sense of myself<br />5. Compensation for a day of hard labor<br />6. Hobbies and reading for pleasure<br />7. Relaxation and letting everything go once in awhile; being irresponsible<br />8. Feeling invincible and having nothing of value to loose<br />9. Being on time and seemingly “having it all together”<br />10. Expecting that things should go “according to plan” (and for the most part, having them do so)<br />11. Eating meals sitting down, with foods I enjoy <span style="font-style:italic;">and until I am full</span><br />12. Social outings for fun and close female friendships<br />13. Date nights & Vacations<br />14. Spending money on things I/we do not “need”<br />15. Living in a tidy home<br />16. Going somewhere without an military-style briefing and pre-packed bag<br />17. Life without doctor’s appointments, school meetings, pharmacy visits, weekly Costco runs, dance, gymnastics and sports classes, scheduled repairs and household maintenance.<br />18. Talking on the phone (other than to coordinate the above)<br />19. Being in a car alone; being in a car other than a mini van<br />20. Quiet<br /><br /><br />10 Things that I know for sure:<br /><br />1. No one could ever deeply love and fully understand our children the way my husband and I do (for now, but we welcome the day when family is added)<br />2. Our bodies cannot be taken forgranted; that good health should be a way of living, and that our focus should be on balance, not rigid restrictions.<br />3. Disrespect, Discrimination, Bigotry, and Cruelty are Evil and should not be tolerated in ourselves or others, but countered with open love and kindness.<br />4. There is joy in every day of life and that every tiny gift should be celebrated.<br />5. Swearing is sometimes very necessary – even if only privately.<br />6. “Time outs” are more for the parent than the child.<br />7. That educating oneself, exploring, reading, adventuring…should continue on to the very last breath.<br />8. Nothing anyone can ever say to you, will be as profound as what they do not, that words really do hurt and that forgiveness is freedom<br />9. There is humor in almost any situation and that laughing allows the soul to be renewed.<br />10. Dr Merry’s Potty Pal is the best family-friendly potty training device that ever was inventedJThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-52192350933065111222009-11-04T14:20:00.004-05:002009-11-04T14:44:37.620-05:00Caught By Surprise<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaOTRCpTLCfKL2D5MwkCKCDjDhhIiupAosRNwd6DfA2FLG6ws3l7W2fskY_orTPN-vLuQCajjo31se_bmSVarvvd3JmSTG9CtwcQGC0n2kGS9x-38vcz-5ND_9qa4Q6KygjSd4r3r1zKE/s1600-h/Q1LYOp.jpeg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 201px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaOTRCpTLCfKL2D5MwkCKCDjDhhIiupAosRNwd6DfA2FLG6ws3l7W2fskY_orTPN-vLuQCajjo31se_bmSVarvvd3JmSTG9CtwcQGC0n2kGS9x-38vcz-5ND_9qa4Q6KygjSd4r3r1zKE/s320/Q1LYOp.jpeg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400332119893572386" /></a><br />My “to do” list for today was simple. Okay, it was <span style="font-style:italic;">supposed</span> to be simple. This morning was designated for the usual things: basic clean up, deep cleaning, two loads of laundry, lunches for tomorrow, prepare tonight's dinner, and catch up on ebay sales. Why is it then, that I am still staring at an un-made bed and lounging in my pajamas? Gotta’ admit, it feels really good! And in all fairness, Mr Adorable (aka Jim) did drop in un-announced for lunch <span style="font-style:italic;">and dessert</span> while the kids were at school, lol…That is worth a re-shuffle of priorities any afternoon! I feel so lucky to have him and for us to have a sense of humor about things. I feel very, very grateful.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-86811957050550786342009-11-03T13:39:00.002-05:002009-11-04T15:49:16.132-05:00Mile In My Shoes<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglschWr9QpFh-hAajWQ08SUd7wunaZxJUwuuqBcslUDtO5Nlkkpx-VHc24yspsx-sz1HjGHgjGs6qXB3R3ghDiXCw1chy3B8jpley3AH7LO5q-iVxcEre6QMnHuzmIzCxigomf-liuVzE/s1600-h/090607-woman-body-02.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglschWr9QpFh-hAajWQ08SUd7wunaZxJUwuuqBcslUDtO5Nlkkpx-VHc24yspsx-sz1HjGHgjGs6qXB3R3ghDiXCw1chy3B8jpley3AH7LO5q-iVxcEre6QMnHuzmIzCxigomf-liuVzE/s320/090607-woman-body-02.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400327895748199282" /></a><br />Going Back to “almost the beginning” I can see why my feet have never been able to firmly plant in the ground, and why it takes so many peeled layers just to see my face. Five years ago we moved into this house and that is one story. Five years before that, Jim and I became engaged and started our life together. And in another story altogether is the person I was in my first life.<br /><br />The first twenty years went by slowly while I was moving through them but now seem like a blurry array of photographs scattered on the floor or an old video that cuts out in the middle of scenes and features a cast of actors you have never seen before. I had so many dreams and ideas as a young girl. I knew I was destined to be a mother, an artist, a teacher, a writer, a person that deeply cares for others. I did not know how difficult it was going to be to get there.<br /><br />Time passes though. Love and knowledge find a way of moving around obstacles, meeting resolve, closure, peace, hopefulness…<br /><br />After nearly ten years of “just saying no,” I am ashamed to say that I fantasized about lighting up today. What made me stop back then in the first place? - New hope. When I found out I was pregnant with our first child, everything changed - E-V-E-R-Y- T-H-I-N-G! For a moment, as I glanced down at the double-lined results of my HPT, time froze like it does for Hiro Nakamura on ABC’s “Heroes.”<br /><br />Though I was not rescuing the entire world during that stand still, I was making a crucial decision to rescue myself. Just like then, there is always new hope and a thousand reasons not to return to the past but instead, to move forward with renewed hope that everything happens for a reason and that there is always a blessing in unexpected changes.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-30706051940865514912009-10-29T18:14:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:18:28.605-05:00Sky is Falling<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4QjbhCZwZJOQK1ff1hGliVZEKC2PDI39s52i1Eh7O-l8Mge1jr7h80tFcQRnEJx8j6vQV50DygSzAg63saKKYtyL4lEMytmhPWdoR9x1PyaGV9LZVYf9Eh8M1DjV5t2fsVRKhp3Dwec4/s1600-h/shapeimage_2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4QjbhCZwZJOQK1ff1hGliVZEKC2PDI39s52i1Eh7O-l8Mge1jr7h80tFcQRnEJx8j6vQV50DygSzAg63saKKYtyL4lEMytmhPWdoR9x1PyaGV9LZVYf9Eh8M1DjV5t2fsVRKhp3Dwec4/s320/shapeimage_2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400067105368210610" /></a><br />Variations of this same scenario have played out in my head a thousand times since Jim was hospitalized a few years back. We have heard whispers of lay-offs many times before, but not like this. Jim thinks it will be just before Christmas, maybe sooner. <br />Meanwhile, we have to get the closets, flooring and trim completed to bring closure and meaning to all of our hard work so far and for the “what ifs” around the corner. And somewhere in all of this chaos, we have to keep pushing around school, state, and managed care to keep our oldest on track – find some answers. We have to protect and maintain normalcy for all three of our children and keep up with the “routines.” The clouds above are letting loose and as I hold up my umbrella, I wonder how long it can stand up against this relentless downpour. Fearful of the unknown future, I comfort myself with this thought:<br />In every one of my scenarios and possible outcomes, I still have this family. That is a ground zero we can certainly build up from despite any devastating collapse. That is the only truly important “thing.”JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-45386708235578582692009-10-28T18:15:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:21:12.216-05:00Jeans & The “Bootay”<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPA79-cSh6ZszI85-U-gMcpRtYgaVq-RIchSzC_8urcPMkZh4X8DMAH1ADvepGqoYZU8V41FgZBRuovW5CBqxJwNONOqnAFWsY2OMHJIvDq98g4u58XjJzCXoVU2usQfdkuy79u5okPbE/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPA79-cSh6ZszI85-U-gMcpRtYgaVq-RIchSzC_8urcPMkZh4X8DMAH1ADvepGqoYZU8V41FgZBRuovW5CBqxJwNONOqnAFWsY2OMHJIvDq98g4u58XjJzCXoVU2usQfdkuy79u5okPbE/s320/shapeimage_2-1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400067806446328050" /></a><br />Yesterday I was catching up on my Oprah when I witnessed her revelation to the world, of “the best jean” by CJ. Okay, they might very well be “the best” and who am I to argue with Oprah…but for the price tag of one to two hundred dollars, they had better be so damn sexy that my husband takes one good look and is satisfied for the whole night! Later on that show, a “more affordable” jean was also announced. This one was a Lee brand sold at JC Penny stores for around $40. Here again I am thinking…I do not think I have ever paid over $20 for a pair of jeans…and that included tax! …What are those jeans going to do for me for that kind of money? I can tell you that no matter how great they are, my butt will still be right here taunting me in the mirror. To the ladies struggling to make ends meet and still searching for that perfect jean (at a price that you can actually afford), I have some suggestions of my own for the (as she put it) “bootay.”<br /><br />There is a jean called “1.8” by YMI that is 82% cotton, 16% poly and 2% spandex, higher in the back, snuggles around base of hips in the front, and manages to hide everything you don’t want seen while making you look sexy and feel like you never took your pajamas off! This jean does not have any big fancy pockets or buttons but is streamlined and does not wrinkle! To shop at YMI Jeans Direct, visit their blog (yup they have their own), store locator & such, click on the link here http://www.ymijeans.com/ I found my great deal on these jeans at Dots. Dots stores sell them anywhere from $12.99-18.99 and for that price - you can afford a top or accessories to go with! Find Dots store near you at http://www.dots.com/ <br />So good luck on your search for that perfect jean. I have found mine ...Now if I could only find the perfect work out routine!JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-8261015193520392342009-10-23T18:12:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:22:18.380-05:00The Fague<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSQYPWHmH-xlrAh8nQYdT2Ul2CJ1WFEjjANzqsSjfQ8nIXud_sN-GKgtSeafixi0vWO2P-i1y6YWbnCeK6qub7nuTQNkFgVzN9QDpANssvoOrFXTAi-qtXSgIukGD4ZAPSn1iTgYgrUUU/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSQYPWHmH-xlrAh8nQYdT2Ul2CJ1WFEjjANzqsSjfQ8nIXud_sN-GKgtSeafixi0vWO2P-i1y6YWbnCeK6qub7nuTQNkFgVzN9QDpANssvoOrFXTAi-qtXSgIukGD4ZAPSn1iTgYgrUUU/s320/shapeimage_2-2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400068091806437970" /></a><br />Waking up this morning was like coming out of a fugue and realizing you had been unconscious during the event of something important, significant, body-altering. I was groggy and my body felt more tired than usual...just would not get up. Was I hit by a truck while sleeping in my bed? As I slowly proceeded to sit up, I experienced a deja vu of the night before, of being cozily tucked into the recesses of the couch while watching a recorded episode of the CBS program Crime Scene Investigation. Glancing downward, It was clear that I had missed something very important, something I always mark on the calendar to let me know how to “plan.” In the kitchen later, I was still rubbing my eyes as I searched all those crucial little squares that hold the details of our lives together. How could I have been so out of touch with myself this month? As a woman, some intuitions are so strong within us, I am irritated by my carelessness and the inconvenience. I am cramping and hunched over feeling like I should go back to bed. I pause for a moment and promise myself to take better care of me today. But first, I must cycle two loads of laundry, shower, dress, feed and clean up for three kids and get them onto a bus.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-53749147609063223422009-10-22T18:12:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:22:58.655-05:00Chauffeur a’ la’ Mom<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0_alj9l14jmmwZMVrLxamKJ4BeERA5qyic8NLZgmkRM_rMJAFtCnrQ4IE09eNFWNLowNMPFAa8NRK0gygJZ_-L1wCZtnR7QYazseTez-pjls3_bkHZzmZEJzvmAvqThmP2PkLXz1N0II/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-3.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0_alj9l14jmmwZMVrLxamKJ4BeERA5qyic8NLZgmkRM_rMJAFtCnrQ4IE09eNFWNLowNMPFAa8NRK0gygJZ_-L1wCZtnR7QYazseTez-pjls3_bkHZzmZEJzvmAvqThmP2PkLXz1N0II/s320/shapeimage_2-3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400068279101937714" /></a><br />Trying desperately to keep my eyes from squinting closed under the pressure of this two day migraine. The oldest has begun going off on another tangent about the finger stick he will be having at his annual physical (almost six months away still) and how and why they need this information from his blood and why can’t they just scrape open one of his existing scabs, etc, etc... This is of course, is an ongoing theme for him. Earlier, as we were leaving dance class, it was a forty-five minute discourse on the fact that his mouth stings “so bad” from having bitten his inner lip. He bites his tongue and inner lip at least several times a week and as a young child, used to do it a few times a day, so it is not surprising that he could generate such a grand discussion on the topic. Also given his lack of tolerance to pain and discomfort, and the length of time he takes to discuss most things he is interested in, this is just an average evening drive. I am the lucky chauffeur a’ la mom. <br /><br />Sitting slumped over against my seatbelt, I grip the wheel tighter, trying to not swerve into the oncoming traffic as the sounds of Gabe’s loud shrieking for his sister to “stop it Warren” and Loren’s intentionally annoying humming increasingly rises to meet the volume of his voice. Meanwhile Nate continues to ramble on as he stares blankly into the darkness through the window in front of him, so engrossed in his own thoughts, he is blissfully unaware of all else. Maybe If It was possible to hear some of his lecture, I could actually join him in his private world...but not tonight. Tonight the mission is just to “get home.” ...After that?...Who knows...JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-89406371231480320492009-10-21T18:11:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:24:03.914-05:00Drawing Blanks<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2j8YYPiX-pSjnxkkEMbQAqeK6P_ITFaP6aA4c5dzUsOoQy2EPGXvPOztamVpSMzp3df5FdGHoqyZ-w7V3SMPVxl0LXhcCeylVJX9AM6sOIlhgRk2JTx4mnF9Mc_PNfY_M15W3Y6Sm6V0/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-4.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2j8YYPiX-pSjnxkkEMbQAqeK6P_ITFaP6aA4c5dzUsOoQy2EPGXvPOztamVpSMzp3df5FdGHoqyZ-w7V3SMPVxl0LXhcCeylVJX9AM6sOIlhgRk2JTx4mnF9Mc_PNfY_M15W3Y6Sm6V0/s320/shapeimage_2-4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400068558876878466" /></a><br />After seeing another doctor with Nate this morning, I am more confused about our unique situation and how to explain it, but at least received confirmation that I am doing everything I can for now, and that there is no need to take things further than this (at this time) unless I’m willing to “experiment” with more meds, Nathan is no longer meeting academic standards, or there is a crisis. <br /><br />Wish there was a way we could find the answers to our hearts questions without opening certain doorways and stepping on so many toes. All this psychological “muck” parents go through to help their children along in life, just cannot compare to what our souls instinctively tell us we have to do.<br /><br />Nathan is beautiful and special. Nathan is well. Nathan just has more difficulty than most people getting on with a “normal” day. And that is okay. We are here to give him whatever advantages in life he needs and none of those he doesn’t. We may be drawing blanks when it comes to “concrete” information, but we have all the knowledge we need to be his parents.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-4339187172904014222009-10-13T18:06:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:25:01.849-05:00Lore of Yesteryear<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUKEITCsEWeqrva309-b08yf2HvjvqjY6U2SyBYZau-xmKcByJJKNfPy4Iz4AaudBftsb1Gd1VBJh8p1IkW5XGBdbGeTVc7kR7BBK0LiFIW54oDzpItK0oUr5qVjHotCj5XFCjAchZwXc/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-5.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUKEITCsEWeqrva309-b08yf2HvjvqjY6U2SyBYZau-xmKcByJJKNfPy4Iz4AaudBftsb1Gd1VBJh8p1IkW5XGBdbGeTVc7kR7BBK0LiFIW54oDzpItK0oUr5qVjHotCj5XFCjAchZwXc/s320/shapeimage_2-5.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400068816012611346" /></a><br />There is a certain kind of wisdom and charm....a magnetism that our older generations carry with them in the later years of life. We are drawn to them ...to hear their lore of yesteryear, the grand stories, the accounts of lessons learned, their advice on future endeavors...We should all feel blessed to share these precious moments with them and to take away those valuable trinkets of knowledge and beauty. <br /><br />This past weekend, we enjoyed a surprise and rare visit from my grandfather who was generous with what little time he had to share on his short traverse to Massachusetts for a 60th High School Reunion. I admire his bravery and ‘spunk’ to arrive here alone and to join us on such adventuresJThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-45135002636816285152009-10-07T18:05:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:28:02.906-05:00Some Answers<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ7zSTq3_GL7vumMMMv_g-TjNoWHLp4angGjC3SFty_XGNKD387K8pC0qXJD_MkuDKMOxv7OnXjlhspOtRkStYUxn3IXOa05BjsdXjvGZVs5onG3kURvAkTXh2Ja6LyES68l88-Hcei5I/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-6.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ7zSTq3_GL7vumMMMv_g-TjNoWHLp4angGjC3SFty_XGNKD387K8pC0qXJD_MkuDKMOxv7OnXjlhspOtRkStYUxn3IXOa05BjsdXjvGZVs5onG3kURvAkTXh2Ja6LyES68l88-Hcei5I/s320/shapeimage_2-6.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400069581860116018" /></a><br />Today I spoke with Nate’s pediatrician about adjusting meds again. She agreed we should make another appointment to get things right, weigh him and update the “game plan.” In the meantime, she asked that I make an appointment to see the one doctor we have been avoiding (for an evaluation). That makes three professional suggestions now - “to rule things out” of course...<br /><br />Later I called the Parent Advisory Council in our state about some of the things I cannot get anyone else to answer for us - the things I must know <span style="font-style:italic;">first.</span> They are an amazing resource for anyone with a child that has special needs and were extremely helpful. I feel much more confident and ready to move forward now....One day at a time.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-89232371882585160082009-10-06T18:04:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:29:29.188-05:00So Many Questions<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1-Bsg7BO_dTRYO0oAaeCqW0DSnmPnUjxsLOiOIztLpHxOSW9a-L-26DPf2idh6AWtng9Hdo576RKM8v9wV22mFzsidiiXVgyEXb9jg_PyJImEQLeB7aWFdU9i5TsPdF1NCj9LTiJsxcM/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-7.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 249px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1-Bsg7BO_dTRYO0oAaeCqW0DSnmPnUjxsLOiOIztLpHxOSW9a-L-26DPf2idh6AWtng9Hdo576RKM8v9wV22mFzsidiiXVgyEXb9jg_PyJImEQLeB7aWFdU9i5TsPdF1NCj9LTiJsxcM/s320/shapeimage_2-7.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400069957134604962" /></a><br />Nathan is still loosing weight and as soon as we have spoken to his therapist tonight, I will be calling his pediatrician about this current medication he is on. The past week or so, he has still not wanted to eat anything. Adding complication to the matter, these new pills do not seem to have any of their “intended” effects. Translation: Nate is struggling again and so are we. <br />For the longest time, all we could see were the attention issues he had and the resulting behaviors that can often be associated with ADD-type struggles. Until we met a point with the previous medication (and therapy) where some of those behaviors had been lessened or eliminated, the deeper layer of Nate’s complexities, were obscured from our primary view. So clearly now, I see it…There is something more.<br /><br />Everyone has one of those family members that you love just the same but maybe just seems odd, awkward, eccentric, peculiar, different …For most people that meet him, Nathan would never appear to be anything but completely “normal.” Whatever we have done or continue to do – it has been tremendously successful. Nate is a beautiful, kind-hearted, loving boy who is self-confident, social and out-going. He participates in many after-school activities and has many long-term friendships. We know though, there is something else…the “stuff” we hide so well but that is getting increasingly difficult to mask.<br /><br />We have another function ahead and I am so nervous. Beyond ADD, I have no answers to explain why we feel like we have to be with him at all time, why we do not trust his interactions and behaviors to be appropriate and why he could construe a simple social interaction to be scary, hurtful, threatening and possibly take physical action. We cannot explain why he is so unnerved by the tiniest things or why everything must take a 500 page essay to explain and pick apart. It is exhausting, but for whatever reason...it is our “normal” right now.<br /><br />Meanwhile…let us not forget the other complicated little people sketching out their own little ideas and personalities on the same “pad” …I suppose that if life is art and art is expression, we are always in a state of expressing our colorful bond with one another in unique and different ways ...but always with love and respect.<br />There is definitely something more going on with Nathan, but we need more answers to some initial questions before we can ask certain ‘other questions.’ <br /><br />If there is “something more,” how does it (hypothetically) affect his daily life and is there anything we can do to alleviate the symptoms or eliminate the issue? What does a label do for him? How can a label hurt him? We continue our quest for answers in tonight’s session.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-91173159388667335532009-10-01T18:02:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:31:03.217-05:00Sweeter Than Candy<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz6IGMOLiB6dIEbXRddmhRCrQd3HbL_0Oal-HFjk_8usLWL1Q4A_9jgNmV7zUa4Kw2HqCyxcDmF-wEzk1hHffGIaIRoyPh6pMQ3oiOSrD9SIrDRYM5djEeQ_xkz-lHDLxqHi3eG46ZX7k/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-8.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz6IGMOLiB6dIEbXRddmhRCrQd3HbL_0Oal-HFjk_8usLWL1Q4A_9jgNmV7zUa4Kw2HqCyxcDmF-wEzk1hHffGIaIRoyPh6pMQ3oiOSrD9SIrDRYM5djEeQ_xkz-lHDLxqHi3eG46ZX7k/s320/shapeimage_2-8.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400070354020987906" /></a><br />Notorious for skipping school in my own time, I continue to make no reservation about pulling my own children out of school from time to time for a little “get-away,” “personal field trip,” and other such fun-seeking adventures. Sometimes that tiny little escape is sweeter than candy, keeps us from needing to take “actual sick days” and well worth the disruption of our over-scheduled lives. Today was the orchard and the baking of our first apple pie and crisp!...<br /><br /><br />Here Is What We Made:<br /><br />The “YUMMIEST” Sugar Free Apple Pie<br />4 c Apple Slices (Peeled)<br />1 (small box) Sugar Free French Vanilla Pudding Mix<br />2 Tbsp Organic Smart Balance (Vegan Butter)<br />½ tsp Nutmeg<br />½ tsp Apple Pie Spice<br />1 tsp Ground Cinnamon<br />½ tsp (pure) Lemon Juice<br />2 9” Round Pie Crusts (one for top and another for bottom)<br /><br />Directions: Peel and Slice Apples, Set Aside. Next, preheat oven to 350 degrees and make your crusts; fold over and set aside. Then mix all other ingredients and apples until there is a sticky covering. Assemble your pies with bottom crust, apple filling and then top crust, making sure to pinch the sides closed and leave a few air pockets or slits in the very top. Bake at least 45 minutes/until golden brown.<br /><br />The “SPECTACULAR” Sugar Free Apple Crisp<br />The Filling<br />½ c Splenda Brown Sugar<br />2 tbsp Unsweetened Minute Tapioca<br />½ tsp Ground Cinnamon<br />4 c Apple Slices (Peeled)<br />The Topping<br />1 ¼ c Quick Oats Oatmeal/Approx 5 Packets of Plain Instant Oatmeal<br />½ c Organic Whole Wheat Flour<br />¼ c Splenda Brown Sugar<br />½ c Organic Smart Balance (Vegan Butter)<br /><br />Directions: Peel and Slice Apples, Set Aside. Preheat Oven to 350 Degrees. Spray 8 x 8” pan or similar bakeware with non-stick spray. Combine Filling Ingredients in One Bowl and Mix Topping Ingredients in Another. Once finished with both mixtures, pour the Filling into your pan first, followed by the Topping. Bake 45-50 Minutes until crumbled topping is brown and crispy.<br /><br />ENJOY!JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-27741081435700969352009-09-28T18:01:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:34:41.396-05:00Feeling The Squeeze and Making Juice<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ1mRruEEYxRb33I8A4m7bw7TtfCffHmkeaev-aQeMfNDY8ztO2DVh-rv-7sCIaknsw6yDmRYqaBe7H4fgbPNrtiZp119LhZczwqbODkK2iriizaE0FDaGAQqx1MXHL9YpSeoBKNUdvls/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-9.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ1mRruEEYxRb33I8A4m7bw7TtfCffHmkeaev-aQeMfNDY8ztO2DVh-rv-7sCIaknsw6yDmRYqaBe7H4fgbPNrtiZp119LhZczwqbODkK2iriizaE0FDaGAQqx1MXHL9YpSeoBKNUdvls/s320/shapeimage_2-9.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400071290082335682" /></a><br />Where it is often simple, life can also get very confusing. There are so many questions and answers, what couldaz,’ shouldaz’, and “may have beenz” or “might bees” dancing about.<br /><br />The way I see it, the main problem is that there is no real instruction manual for how to go about things, make choices and face hardships. We can pray for guidance, listen to the spirit within us and hope that the choices we make are the right ones at that moment ...But in the end, we have to keep making lemonade out of the squeeze, changing the recipe a little each time, until the flavor is right.<br /><br />The ingredients I am using this week: patience, humility, sadness, confidence, strength, perseverance, communication, respect, love and intellect.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-41642365495232829652009-09-26T18:00:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:35:52.001-05:00Changes Big and Small, Smiles of Plenty<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ONzFF2-9Vvh-_0x_BaGEbS4FdAbmT5nomJ4r3BWXNVOEsiHEJ2zpL09SoREefZbRjgPHb2BNXV2NpuQ_wlbxkp0yZ7i4ZWJTIuQlN0mSIvRKiRl26_EmGAZsW0ek07Ig6Vmd_mcAEdc/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-10.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ONzFF2-9Vvh-_0x_BaGEbS4FdAbmT5nomJ4r3BWXNVOEsiHEJ2zpL09SoREefZbRjgPHb2BNXV2NpuQ_wlbxkp0yZ7i4ZWJTIuQlN0mSIvRKiRl26_EmGAZsW0ek07Ig6Vmd_mcAEdc/s320/shapeimage_2-10.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400071604578461250" /></a><br />Li-lo grew several inches, gained several pounds and turned seven this year. She also increasingly became a more diverse and accomplished artist: took a more active interest in photography, began using several new mediums and techniques, exploring her sense of fashion and style, took a more active role in her hair colors and cosmetics, and developed an insatiable love for baking! <br /><br />This amazing, passionate, sweet little person also gave up her big day to go grocery shopping and attend her brother’s soccer game with no fuss at all. She said that “between dinner at (her fave restaurant) and getting to bake cookies with her new birthday set, it was the best birthday ever.”<br /><br />The next day she continued to shine when the sun wouldn’t. After a month of beautiful weather, our plans to go celebrate her birthday at a local amusement park with friends were foiled under a huge rain cloud. Loren said “That’s okay, we’ll just find something else to do.” That is her way, and that is only one of the countless reasons she is so very special.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-6448038368576644652009-09-19T17:59:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:36:19.500-05:00The City<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjg7NK0GbUjRHlhC26HFLfjuishDt5IVHpNzwQAx51cgRj5ryLmuMUMRJxNEFaSrOsGg8WV61b_LQahR1kd9YqY2CpzAOLePzzpHHiUim1dNB3DmqTYdjUulWWCfOMxlG6q64LkJNW7-tk/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-11.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjg7NK0GbUjRHlhC26HFLfjuishDt5IVHpNzwQAx51cgRj5ryLmuMUMRJxNEFaSrOsGg8WV61b_LQahR1kd9YqY2CpzAOLePzzpHHiUim1dNB3DmqTYdjUulWWCfOMxlG6q64LkJNW7-tk/s320/shapeimage_2-11.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400071722752450978" /></a><br />A Perfect time and place to remember and make new memories...<br /><br />Ten years ago, Jim and I drove into Manhattan where he purposed on a romantic carriage ride through Central Park and we took in a day at the Met. This Fall we brought our children back to the city for an adventure filled with great memories from the past and many new ones we are sure to never forget.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-12183909935743988892009-09-12T17:58:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:36:46.532-05:00Gratefully Moving Forward<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFLUNNcBsIVoTMFCNsX0OEH12ji42i-yy5pbaFPJkOjntBdrcY-YgwSCcjSUEw71ahymI0jQ5XXfqkZvxkeg7NSDbLwsSJexB_bTIXMgPWBxxDyTIZ3lGZuL_4GrnZopvOIh3003nW74g/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-12.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFLUNNcBsIVoTMFCNsX0OEH12ji42i-yy5pbaFPJkOjntBdrcY-YgwSCcjSUEw71ahymI0jQ5XXfqkZvxkeg7NSDbLwsSJexB_bTIXMgPWBxxDyTIZ3lGZuL_4GrnZopvOIh3003nW74g/s320/shapeimage_2-12.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400071844557343042" /></a><br />Fall is creeping in and just like any other season, we are taking in all the fresh air we can, looking for adventure in unlikely places and stepping forward with renewed hope at a time when we need to be most thankful for all of our blessings & generous with what little gifts we can offer.<br /><br />Together we always find ways to have an incredibly great time even when things get really tough. We remind ourselves that it is so good to be continually making a home and enjoying our family...the good, the bad and the otherwise...we still have one another.<br /><br />As we continually work on many home projects and I stay on the “job hunt,”coordinating resulting/upcoming childcare, after-school activities and all the other nuances of daily life, Our Family is generally staying very, very busy.<br /><br />Looking ahead we are gearing up for a productive season, finishing the interior walls, yard & outside projects & hoping to start laying out the floors and gutting our charming 60s style bathrooms this Winter. ...But we’ll have to see...<br /><br />This is our family life - a crazy, fast pace, blessed and full life, complete with everyday struggles and surprises at every turn.<br /><br />While we pioneer the unknown course ahead with all of you, we wish you health & happiness.JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8459363785299875496.post-40638912974879547202009-09-08T17:57:00.001-04:002009-11-03T21:37:36.490-05:00Happy Campers<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtwVmIvYCWC8ia6jStPsTjRXQUHJSb_M2xST3SEEkoZlg5GXWA3pAWOZdplvWeCdezF9gqmrSEiDV0I8dPWuCZONo2s0pAHqXHbLj3qd9tp6x69jb4mXQQEXSXYJKWeep5zClyi3TeWEE/s1600-h/shapeimage_2-13.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 188px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtwVmIvYCWC8ia6jStPsTjRXQUHJSb_M2xST3SEEkoZlg5GXWA3pAWOZdplvWeCdezF9gqmrSEiDV0I8dPWuCZONo2s0pAHqXHbLj3qd9tp6x69jb4mXQQEXSXYJKWeep5zClyi3TeWEE/s320/shapeimage_2-13.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5400072055094488258" /></a><br />The only thing better than spending a long relaxing day on the beach is a few days where no one has to drive home for dinner afterward. Instead? ...a short walk back to camp where we grilled up some burgers, roasted marshmellows and shared funny stories and cold brew around the campfire with friends.<br /><br />We will never forget Labor Day Weekend 2009 - It will now be long-lived as our very “first family camping trip” and a super fantastic time!JThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09911859480847465201noreply@blogger.com0